Both of my grandmothers are still living, and yet when I speak to the crow in my mind, she is Grandmother.My mother has none of the qualities of a big cat, and yet when the panther appeared in my dream, I called her Mother.I find myself wondering if this is subconscious pretense or true
spiritual a . . . (
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Sometimes we fight. I don't mean that we just disagree and argue a little. I mean sometimes... We cry, and yell, and lose any semblance of sanity. Sometimes I feel like ripping into someone with teeth and nails 'til blood flows, and I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one.It used to leave me feeli . . . (
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"Trust in the love you have forgotten..."They're right. I forgot. For a minute there... I forgot everything I ever was. I became someone else who knew nothing of love as a force, only an item.I had forgotten that it is not divided through the sharing. It grows.I'm sorry.I could make excuses. I can a . . . (
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My mother and father divorced when I was very young. Two years old. Or four. Something like that. Not long after, my mother and I moved out of state. I saw my father on holidays, and during the summer, when I was a kid. When I hit my teen years, it was more during the summer, and maybe Christmas. . . . (
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I started writing this a while ago, when someone asked me a seemingly simple question. I've put a lot of thought into it. I'm posting it now, because I finally think it is finished. The question was:Is there one thing that quickly takes you beyond the normal boundaries of yourself? Beyond the . . . (
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I haven't felt like myself lately. I'm not sure how that fits in to the cause/effect cycle of not writing. It's not just my writing that is suffering, though. I don't know how to fix the problem, because I'm not sure exactly what the problem is. All I seem to be able to confirm is that it is definit . . . (
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I've started writing four times. The words escape me.
I don't know if this is true for everyone, but it is true for me.There comes a point where trust is broken beyond reasonable repair. Not that it could not be regained -- and in the experience I had recently, it very nearly was -- but that the method of regaining is so far beyond what can be expected . . . (
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I'm not sure how to say this... I'll put it the best that I can.I will not settle. I will not lay back and take what is given to me if it is less than what I need or want. It won't happen.That means something different than it once might have. Once, it would have meant that when things got too tough . . . (
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I spend far too much time judging myself. I'm sure I'm not alone in this.
Was I right? Was I wrong? Was I good enough? Should I? Shouldn't I? Why am I so messed up?
Just a few of my queries, and my head is spinning.
What if there's nothing wrong with me? What if there's nothing wrong with any of . . . (
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