who am i?


Anjelle
Complicated

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Things I Write About
Processing
Quickie
Emotional
Events
Hubby
State of Mind
Love
K
Joy
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Something Silly
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BDSM
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Lass
Bratling
Jae
Creative Writing
Tarot
P.vert
Arts & Crafts
Pagan/Witchery
Little
Monkey Love
History
Slowing Down
Poly

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designed by: els
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Blue Confusion - from blogskins
Artwork Stephanie Pui-Mun Law

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Sunday, December 07, 2008
Mood Shift

I just got off the phone. And, while I'm convinced that I should be happy to have heard from the person on the other end, somehow the call just depressed me.

Seems like we spend a lot of time saying "Lets get together soon." So far, it hasn't happened. No day or time has been set. Just occasional calls.

Seeing him while he's at work is just not the same.

I have a lot of thoughts on this one, but I don't think I could explain. Not in a way that makes sense, anyhow. In summation, the relationship (or lack) just makes me feel like I'm not good enough for him. Not young enough, not pretty enough, not worthy... Not something, I don't know what, but whatever it is I can't change it.

I guess I should talk to him about it. It's not going to change by desire alone.


Friday, December 05, 2008
Irony?

My boss just stopped by my desk. She wanted to let me know that I was talked about yesterday. They are doing some hiring, and someone mentioned me as an example of the type of person they would like to hire. Aw! "Very professional, friendly, always looks nice, and is a hard worker."

When she walked away, I clicked back into the other window where I was checking my yahoo group messages.

Ahem.


Thursday, December 04, 2008
And For Today...

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday, you asshole,
Happy Birthday to you!

Another year older. Another year wiser. (Maybe several years worth of wiser this time, eh?) Another year ahead to get even better.

Thanks for including me in your growing process.

May the next year be even better than the last.


Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Random Things

Inspired by the crafty blogs of others, I would like to extend an idea. Leave a comment in reply to this post, and sometime in the next year, I will send you something I have made. I don't know what, yet, but it will probably be inspired by each individual. I can tell you that I won't even start on it until after the holidays. I will email you for your address, so if I don't have your email already please either include it in your comment, or send it to me via the 'contact me' link under the tagboard.

I did finally make a decision on what my bead project here at work will be. It's going to be a dragonfly in shiney peacock colors, with gold and ivory accents. I will probably make this into a hanging ornament of some sort. (My Yule tree decorations are in garnet red, purple, gold, and pearl. It should fit right in. I might add some blues and/or green... We'll see.)

Things with K are good. We only see each other once every other week, but what time we do have is lovely.

Things with D are also good.

The roomies did not get the house that they applied for, so the rush is off. I am still looking for an apartment, but not as frantically. Still... If I could find a place before Christmas, that would be lovely. Then maybe I could decorate my own tree for the first time in... Uh... Ever. I bought decorations after my first Christmas in my first apartment. Never used them. This year I was given a 4.5ft fake tree. (Thank you!!!) But, with no space of my own, it won't be used.


Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Noting the Obvious

I really must learn to ask for what I want.
I really must learn how to ask.

No sarcasm. No implication of jest. No biting. No suggestion that other parties are failing by their lack of ability to read my frigging mind.

If I fuck it up, just send me back to read this again, ok?


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